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Have
you ever been in a power struggle with someone you love? Have you found
yourself feeling "stuck" and not knowing how you got there and
how to get out of it? When we are in power struggles with someone we
love, we have put ourselves in a lose/lose situation. Have you noticed
that when you "win" the struggle, it's an empty victory?
Actually, when you "win", you've actually "lost". You
may have gotten your way, but in order to do so, someone you love has
been left feeling devalued,
disrespected and as if their needs are less important than yours. That's
not what you want, is it?
The
trick to solving disputes with someone you love is not to create a power
struggle, but to create an environment in which you both feel safe to
express your needs and concerns and feel respected by the other. If you
both feel valued and
respected, you will be empowered to make suggestions for solutions and compromises that will work for
each of you. Remember that even if you are factually "right" in
your mind, making your loved one feel "wrong" or "less
than" will ultimately hurt YOU just as much as them. Remember that
in order to stay connected with someone you love, you must also be
connected with your core value,
and that isn't possible if you are consistently devaluing those you love. You are cheating
yourself out of the best possible life if you don't allow yourself to
respect and value others, just
as much as you respect and value
yourself!
Have
a wonderful month of May! Stop to appreciate those you love and smell the
lovely flowers of spring!
Upcoming Events:
"How to Improve Your Marriage without Talking about
It Workshop"
with Pat Love and Steven Stosny, May 19-20, 2007
Click here for details.
Valuable Resources:
"How to Improve Your Marriage Without
Talking About It: Finding Love Beyond Words" by Patricia
Love, Ed.D and Steven Stosny, Ph.D
"You Don't Have to Take it Anymore: Turn
Your Resentful, Angry, or Emotionally Abusive Relationship into a
Compassionate, Loving One" by Steven Stosny, PhD.
"Manual of the Core Value Workshop" by
Steven Stosny, PhD.
CORE Value,
Inc. provides personal and corporate training about reconnecting with
core value and learning
emotional regulation, empowering you in both your work and home life to
live without anger and resentment and with a strong sense of self.
For information about the services we
provide, visit our website: www.yourcorevalue.com.
All materials of CORE Value,
Inc. are based on the work of Dr. Steven Stosny of www.compassionpower.com.
CORE Value,
Inc will never resell email addresses, and will only send newsletters to
prior clients and those who have opted to receive them. To opt out of receiving these
newsletters, simply email: optout@yourcorevalue.com
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